LOST.

mom and dad dont love me anymore.
all they do is control my life and scold me.
even my siblings couldn't care about me.
there's no place I could call home.

I hate family problems. especially ones which involves both parents and cause us, siblings to be sandwiched in between, making us to make an option to who's right and who's wrong. I don't understand why, there can't be mutual understanding between the two of them, despite so long in years of relationship , shouldn't their ties just get stronger each moment, but why does it seems like the longer it gets, the easier it is to snap, just like a fragile thread ? If my family happens to break up because of this, who's to blame and most importantly what will happen to all of us siblings ? My younger sis isn't strong enough to face up to this problem yet, in fact she cried when my parents always quarrel . Sometimes I wish I could just scream my lungs out in the faces of my parents and give them each a slap to wake them up from this living hell we're facing. When they quarrel, it isn't always about them, it's often kids the ones who suffers in the end.

Why do we have to complicate matters when all we have to do is lose our hot temper, our arrogances and be open minded about who's right and who's wrong and who's to be blame. I believe in a relationship like this , there must be strong trust in between them and give and take is a must. And when a quarrel broke out, it's not just one party fault, however both are at wrong because they fail to be understanding and give and take. If only we humans wouldnt bear grudges and is willing to forgive with all our heart...

No one is perfect, but it's how we react to certain changes which play a part in the future. If we are willing to accept and face the reality, learn from our mistakes and let go of grudges , forgives one another and be humble , and most importantly value and treasure human ties/relationship well , then we are good enough.

It's been really a long time since I update this dead blog of mine. Oh well, it's holiday and nothing feels as boring as this man. I prefer school la, cause that way, i get to see my classmates ( which I havent seen for damn long ), have fun in school and I wouldn't spend my time meaningless at home. All I do at home is laze around and get scolded for not doing some things I'm suppose to do, then either watch movie, facebook or go to sleep. UHHH. how boring is that. MAYBE, I should start DOTA-ing again, but I just dont like losing and dying after a whole long game of 1 hour -.-" This holiday, so far has been a good one for me and hopefully it stays that way. For a start, I passed my TP and got my license ( yea, i know i mentioned this earlier but I'm happy for myself lol ) and GL camp was so far so good. It was fun. Even though I'm just a helper, being there carrying out the event itself, sometimes me myself wish I could experience the fun first hand once again as a group leader, but oh well, that's life. we have to move on. (:

Well, some of the few highlight of the camp was the lim chu kang cementry walk, horror walk at block 50 and station games such as the ones at the pool. LCK cementry walk was okay for me, although it's quite boring just waiting for people to come by and check whether their number is correct. It was just me and yuanqing there waiting for people to come by our checkpoint, guess how boring could that be. But still the funny faces and reaction we get to see from their faces is just classic. Some even bullshit about ghost and stuff. -.-" Of course that would be spirits all around in the graveyard la but they say until like those spirit are going to possess them or eat them up like that. hahaha, their face were as pale as ghost also got la. (: Next day highlight was the horror walk at blk 50. yeah to be truthful that nightwalk was pretty scary, hahaha but I just love it, all I had to do was hide at the corner and when they pass by, just by standing there they get freaked out and go like " WAH CB! oh i'm not suppose to say vulgar words sorry " LOL. damn bloody funny man. there was once the whole group walk pass me and when i tap the shoulder of the last guy, he didnt even dare to turn HAHAHAH. okay la who in the right mind would there to turn their head back and look. xD alot la, but I felt really guilty when Cheryl cried the hell out of her eyes and wanted to get out of that place so badly but I just didnt know what to do. uhhh damn la. but overall the whole thing was pretty dope man.

The whole camp was all about lack of sleep and having lots of fun man hahaha, hopefully when the sport camp come, the group leaders would play their part well and make it a fun and enjoyable one for the freshies.

Gess NCC annual camp is coming soon and it's on the 14th. I'm definitely going back for sure, to tell the cadets bout the life of the past years cadet. I just dont like hearing the facts that most of the ncc guys have turned into a bunch of sissy whimps. No push up, no punishment blabla. Come on, I dont think this is the right way parents nowadays should treat their son, pamper them till they become such a bitch. And when they grow up do all sort of rubbish like piercing, tattooing joinin gangs and all, they cry their lungs out. WHERE IS THE STERN DISCIPLINE that should be taught to them earlier. sigh, kids these days, only want the easier way out. Hope they die in NS when NS come for them man.I dont get it, it's not as if they were treated like dog, it's jus that it's a matter of discipline, you do something wrong, u get punish for it, NO? they must definitely be talk some sense into their head. If not the unit will just fall further into the black hole.

Oh well, I hope this holiday I would do something meaningful, a part time job or some money making opportunity would be good (: money makes the world go round man. no money, no honey!

despite the dramatic racing event with some lousy taxi driver which cause me 8 demerit points, i still passed! I'VE GOT MY LICENSE. now i'm off to camp with a big smile on my face HEHEHEH.



i'll you miss.
(the one who always calls me idiot! (: )